God Is Your Spouse's Father, Too

I do not question the intimacy and relationship with God as my Father. I know some struggle with this aspect of God, especially if their earthly father provided a poor example of what a loving father looks like. But I understand and depend on it, even more since becoming a parent myself. My doubts and questions sink in when it comes to the question of my worthiness to receive the blessings and gifts the Father has to offer, but that's a different topic for different posts (some of which have already been written). I even look to God as Father to my children, trusting that He loves them more than I can comprehend and has plans for them that I can put my trust in. No problem.

I was surprised, then, to realize that I had not, at any point in my marriage, been thinking of God as Father to Scott, my husband. I was reading a bible study called A Lifelong Love, by Gary Thomas. I opened my bible to read 1 John 3:1, not realizing yet that the verse and the study together were about to reveal truths and change my thinking and prayers for Scott forever.

"See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are!" 1 John 3:1

Automatically I applied this to myself. But then I looked at the study, where the author wrote about the time when he sensed God telling him that his wife wasn't just his wife, but she was also God's daughter, and that he needed to treat her as such. I thought about my husband and asked myself whether I thought of, and prayed for, him as God's son. I realized with sadness that the prayers I had been praying for him, though not wrong in and of themselves, were not the messages that he needed to hear from God as his Father. And actually, the prayers I had been praying for him went right along with his weaknesses, insecurities, and battles that he already fights.

The fact is, most men journey through their life battling the fear that they don't quite have what it takes. This manifests differently depending on the personality of the man, but in general men spend their lives fighting this battle and proving to themselves and the people they love that they do have what it takes. Or they live defeated, believing the lie that they don't. My husband is no different. So when I thought about the things I have been praying over him, my heart broke. He doesn't need me to pray that God would change him or grow him or stretch him past his comfort place. Again, those things aren't wrong, and actually are what we as Christians should be striving for. But my man? He needs to hear that he is loved by God, his Father, more than he can imagine, and nothing could ever make him love him more or less. He needs to hear that he is absolutely cherished as a son, even more than he cherishes our son. He needs God to tell him that he was wonderfully made and equipped to accomplish every task that God has for him. He needs to hear that he may not always have what it takes, but he has a God that will more than fill in the gaps. And when he feels and truly knows that, the things that God can go on to accomplish through him are limitless. These are the things that will fill up my prayers for my husband from now on. I want him to walk in the freedom of knowing that God is his Father, and with a Daddy like that you can do anything. 

Again

Is there ever a situation where it's too late to start again?

Ever a period where you've cried too many tears to be heard?

Ever a time where God is unable to redeem?

Is it true that because I've been quiet on here, there's no use trying again?

That's what the enemy tells me. As I've contemplated the gentle nudges from the Father to write, the enemy of my heart hisses in my ear, "Are you even kidding? Just look at what you looked like this year! Afraid. Defeated. Silenced. Weak. Who do you think you are to even imagine that you could be used for anything good?"

He's right, of course. At least partly. God has brought me through some really hard things recently. Some I had gone through prior to beginning this blog. Some I experienced after. But does experiencing the pain, and suffering because of it, invalidate the voice that God has given me? Does that fact that I am so easily shaken, so easily silenced (there, I said it!) mean that in my weakness I can't be used for good?

No matter where this goes, no matter if anyone sees it or no one does, even if it is simply a space for me to lay milestones to show what God has brought me through, it will be worth it. Because I am walking in obedience. Who do I think I am? I am a messenger with an important message. I am humble and even more humbled, but I am not unwilling. I am a child of God. And nothing can undo that.